i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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