he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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