I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
