Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
