We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
