I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My bed smells like the plague
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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