I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize