You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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