she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
