I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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