I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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