Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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