The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
