don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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