Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
worst night to have a conscience
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
