We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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