so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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