So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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