im drinking this country out of the recession.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Randomize
