We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Randomize
