Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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