I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
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