It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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