Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
