i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
