ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
