1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
