on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Randomize
