help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize