just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
