I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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