you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize