Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
