Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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