hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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