so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize