no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize