what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
