He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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