That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize