He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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