3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
