So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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