Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize