You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Let's paint friendship bongs
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
