I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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