hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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