He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
