I'm pants shitting drunk right now
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
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