the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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