how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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